He showed up hours after she gave birth, beaming at his first newborn, Sam Alexis Woods. As Tiger and wife Elin embraced, Tiger winced in pain, still bruised and sore from the grueling 2nd place finish in the U.S. Open at Oakmont the day before.
"The rough was just brutal, and it seems to get worse every year. I don't think it's fair, because guys can get hurt. Golf is supposed to be an enjoyable sport, not a physical challenge." Tiger then pulled up the skin tight t-shirt he was wearing to show a dime-sized bruise on his right lat. "See those? It's going to take me a month or so for those to heal. How am I going to train for the British Open now?"
Elin looked on with sympathy for her brave husband, shaking her head sadly and rubbing his back. At one point, she scooted over in her hospital bad and made a spot for him, rubbing his temples and singing a lullaby to him. He fell asleep within minutes. She then got out of bed, took off his shoes, and pulled the covers over him. When asked if she was tired after giving birth, she laughed.
"A little, but not half as much as Tiger. He just works so hard," said wife Elin. "I really worry about him sometimes. All I did was squeeze something the size of a watermelon out a hole the size of a...well, golf ball. But what Tiger does...that's tough. Golf is a crazy sport, what if he got run over by a golf cart, or tripped on a patch of rough and broke his neck? I hate those people at Oakmont, I wish they would just make the golf course normal, instead of getting so damned cute with it. He has a daughter to think about now, he can't go to work every day worried that he won't come home. It's a battlefield these days."
Tiger stirred some, turning over to his other side and mumbling about possibly taking up smoking before the British Open.
"He's just so used to winning, and along comes this chain-smoker nicknamed 'the duck'," continued Elin. "I mean, really, how does a nobody like that steal the headlines from Tiger?"
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